Recently we were invited to the Chinese Economic and Commercial Counselor in Israel for dinner and as always the bottles of alcohol (Moutai - Chinese liquor, especially) were being pored lavishly. Having a Chinese dinner is really great fun, meeting new people, eating good food, and drinking. Now, I personally like my occasional glass of wine and alcohol and I might even drink more than one, but even I, who likes to drink, can not totally commit to the expectations of drinking and bonding under Chinese culture.
Drinking in China is a very significant part of bonding; this is a way to check out your partner and to create a strong relationship. The drinking part is actually very clever, only after one takes off their work/professional mask, allowing oneself to be relaxed and truthful, only then, can you really see, who is the person behind the mask. Drunkenness is a kind of a truth serum in which you can measure a man or woman as to there integrity, and see how they behave without keeping up appearances.
To my first question, does a woman have to participate in this custom?
Generally speaking, yes, you should probably agree to at least one drink and make it last for the whole night; this is a matter of curtsy and showing a willingness to cooperate.
I usually stop after the second or third and politely decline additional Gambay (bottoms up), it is usually accepted by my Chinese hosts who then exert more pressure on my male partners (this is one good female perk).
If you really don't like to drink, find yourself chinese female partners, with them this is not a problem, because apparently women all over the world drink less and bonding through drinking is not an issue. (We bond through stories about our children, child raising and occasionally shopping).
In any case when drinking in any circumstance don't forget the usual ratio of 1 small glass alcohol to 1 large glass of water.
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